@3 hours ago with 188480 notes
my parents split after they made me. i am a volcano. they are tectonic plates. follow for more geological humour.
i really hope the two people who just followed me aren’t looking for geological humour or you are going to be earth-shatteringly disappointed
this post is one of my best by a landslide
i find my cosmic insignificance reassuring
the stars don’t fucking care who i am or what i do
i owe the universe nothing
i exist on my own terms
#when existentialism becomes comforting rather than horrifying
(via amandaexmachina)@4 hours ago with 123532 notes
So I was at Target with my dad when I wondered around and saw this…
Its Ryan Fucking Gosling on a Diary … It even says stuff inside it
IT GETS BETTER
THIS DIARY ACTUALLY WANTS TO LISTEN TO YOU AND HEAR ABOUT YOUR DAY.
IT ALSO GIVES YOU ITS OWN BUBBLE TO WRITE YOUR OWN COMPLIMENT YO YOURSELF.
(via karpitol)@9 hours ago with 55939 notes
seriously though, list of fucking awful trends in the gay male community:
- "sassy black woman" voice
- t-slurs everywhere
- talking down to women/harassing them because “it’s ok i’m gay lol”
- transphobia towards trans men (ew, vaginas!!!)
- misogyny towards cis women (more ew, vaginas!!!!)
- "gay is the new black" (says white gay men)
like can we just address
(via lenabasilones)@13 hours ago with 10592 notes
ALL YOU FRICKING PEOPLE WALKING AROUND ON THE SIDEWALK ALL OVER THE PLACE LIKE IT’S YOUR DAMN LIVING ROOM AND YOU CAN WALK HOWEVER THE HELL YOU PLEASE
CAN I PLEASE CONVINCE YOU TO TREAT THE SIDEWALK LIKE A STREET
A STREET FOR WALKING
WITH THE SAME RULES AS THE ONES FOR DRIVING
WHAT A CONCEPT
STAY ON YOUR SIDE OF THE FRICKING SIDEWALK. IF YOU ARE IN AMERICA THAT MEANS YOU WALK ON THE GODDAMN RIGHT. DON’T MAKE ME BOB AND WEAVE BETWEEN ALL YOU FRICKERS COMING AT ME ON MY SIDE OF THE SIDEWALK. OR THERE WILL BE ONE OF YOU WALKING TOWARDS ME ON THE PROPER SIDE AND THEN ANOTHER IDIOT WALKING TOWARD ME, BEHIND THEM, ON MY SIDE. LIKE REALLY. YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE ME SWERVE AROUND YOU INSTEAD OF WALKING BEHIND THE OTHER PERSON GOING YOUR SAME DIRECTION. GET AWAY FROM ME.
THE FAR RIGHT IS FOR SLOW PEOPLE. THE LEFT IS FOR PASSING THE SLOW PEOPLE. I HAVE LONG-ASS LEGS. I DON’T WANT TO HAVE TO WALK IN SLOW MOTION BEHIND YOUR SNAIL ASS. I HAVE PLACES TO BE.
IF YOU HAVE OTHER PEOPLE WITH YOU YOU DON’T GET TO TAKE OVER THE ENTIRE WIDTH OF THE SIDEWALK. IF YOU HAVE TO WALK IN SINGLE FILE IN ORDER FOR PEOPLE TO BE ABLE TO GET PAST YOU, SO BE IT. IF YOU’RE ALL COMING AT ME FROM THE OTHER DIRECTION I DON’T WANT TO HAVE TO DUCK UNDERNEATH YOUR LINKED ARMS TO CONTINUE ON MY WAY.
AND ANOTHER THING. PEOPLE IN CARS. GET YOUR ASSES OUT OF THE CROSSWALK WHEN YOU’RE WAITING AT THE LIGHT. SOME OF US NEED TO WALK THERE. WE CAN’T ALL BE WEAVING AROUND YOU. IT PUTS US IN THE PATH OF OTHER TRAFFIC. IF I GET HIT ON MY WAY TO CLASS BECAUSE YOU COULDN’T DECIDE IF YOU WERE GOING TO RUN THE RED LIGHT OR NOT I PROMISE I WILL FIND A WAY TO RUIN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE.@4 hours ago with 3 notes
@8 hours ago with 145720 notes
doesn’t the term “staff member” make you laugh because those 2 words both mean penis
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
~shout out to the people you know in the real world who have inevitably found your tumblr and not told your secrets and just like quietly watch from afar and don’t bring it up in real life y’all are stars~
(via diariesoffranzkafka)@12 hours ago with 4666 notes